Month: December 2015

Waiting

You wait for me to comment on your created world
But this time it won’t happen
I watch quietly for you may disturb the resting
Phantoms
Should you do so fearing my angry roar will be the least
Of your worries
For I have warned you to beware the trees
They remember all your past doings and they wait
For you to become dust
And to strengthen their majestic dynasty
Yes I remember you have no fear of anything
No man, beast so you say
But you have your age old fear of the dark places
You know in the locked place
The one you call your heart
And I name an empty chamber of ghouls
That the darkness calls to you cosseting your ears
With a lovers smooth words
One day you will walk into your own forest
Full of ogres, spectres,  ghouls of days gone
You thought
And find yourself unable to escape from your own creation

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Painted world

Watching in the mirror with a sultry smile painted on
She hides herself away
The glare of the masses harsh against her mind
Trying to change to create
A self that is accepted by others she nods
For now she’s covered herself up and who can tell?
The paint like a warriors woad designed with care
Impressive and exactly portraying something
Her power she thinks is an imaginary force
Coming with the paint
She will discover one day as she forgets powder and kohl
It was always there flowing
Just beneath the surface waiting to erupt
And change the world she inhabits

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Wonder of the dance

Hardly a breath taken as she leans closer, closer still 
Getting drawn in to her own astonishment as the tale dances in her veins 
It takes her over and she is not an observer she is there 
Audible intake of breath as the snow begins to fall inside the room fluttering down 
Her hand clapped to her mouth 
Head shaking in disbelief as the girl in the feathered tutu seems to fly across the boards 
And she is so overcome the tears sting her eyelids but don’t break free
Incase they hamper her view of the wonders ahead 
She is part of their world if even for a short time it’s a glimpse into myth and magic 
But it’s true because she’s here and a witness to every move they make
She can believe in magic in its sparkly , twinkly beauty 
Because magic shows its ugliness and glamour in equal measure and there’s always a way
A way through the dark, the fear 
She leaves after the encore filled with a knowing otherness 
She will make her own future and she is beautiful 
She can be , she is magic.

Ailsa
©AilsaCawleyPoetry2015

Blinded by glitter

You tell yourself it’ll be fine and you’ll get to it later
Because it’s never went wrong on you before has it?
Has it?
Oh right, I forgot again, nothing is ever your fault
And while you scurry off muttering white rabbits and chasing
The latest piece of blinding glitter down a hole,
To find out of this is the piece of glitter to make yoy whole
Complete the collection
You missed the one who shines with effervescent light beside you,
Or pushed behind you because you saw glitter
And had to chase your precious
Whilst leaving a diamond surrounded by rubies in the dust
Because it hadn’t enough glamour and wonder the shine worn off
Chase your next dream
Go on be my guest there will be nothing left next time you turn
To the jewel of them all
So many warnings and portents of your ruination have you had
Yet you ignored them all as fools knowing nothing
Carry on taking till there’s nothing left but ask yourself
What happens then?
Too blinded by glitter to see the real shine of truth
And now you’re left no sparkle, no sunshine warmth
In a yellowing sepia picture left out in the desert too long
Dry ,crackling and bare
You remember behind you, turn but nobody is there.

Ailsa
©AilsaCawleyPoetry2015

Understanding

It’s dawning on her slowly as she seeks to not believe
That again the door is closed on her
A step forward with a smile she nods and offers a yes
To the question of whether she understands
Of course she doesn’t but what can be said
It makes no difference to say otherwise and appear foolish
When the door to discussion is locked and barred
Where do you go
You can have no understanding or clarity
And it changes nothing
Just adds one more tick to the chart of letdowns
Going towards the land of doesn’t matter any more
He has won a small victory with no arguments he thinks
Puffed up with ego like a balloon floating on his win
Till the day he is left shocked as he watches her
Cut the cord
In full and clear understanding.

Ailsa
© AilsaCawleyPoetry2015

Inner sanctum

I feel myself being propelled towards you without a clue why
But an absolute knowing that there is meaning in meeting
A friend I think that just brightens the moments
Because you sparkle with life,  enthusiasm for all
And you draw people in
They like me can become hypnotised in your company
You have that gift you give with no awareness
That there’s no-one else in the world but the person now
And you leave them feeling that way
Brighter, more hopeful and knowing that you mean your words
They are not merely vowels and consonants tacked together
That fall apart in the tiniest shower of rain
Hold fast and promises are made to keep
So I know as you spread sparkle from your eyes
Invisible glitter that brightens a day here or there
That you have just given more than you are aware of
When someone sidles by and asks am I jealous
Their startled face is blank when I say
I get far more sparkle than you see here
But the biggest thing is this
(They move closer for the secret)
I have seen his darkness too and that sharing is more
Anyone can share a smile and hide the deepest gloom
But the person who shares that unbidden
Who trusts their pain,  in it’s entirety to my hands
Will never cause jealousy by giving the public side
They keep the private for me and a trusted few
And I am proud to be within that inner sanctum

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Do you remember?

What was it that first drew your eyes to her
And held them there
Who you thought it was you wanted to be a part of
And be the reason for her smile
Do you remember?
Were you trying to make her so that she pushed
It wasn’t your fault
You’ll say she jumped ship not your fault you shrug
Always going to happen
Did your mind engineer it to be this way in the plan
Too good to believe it would last
And now you’re proved right
Do you remember?
Counter argue that one day it maybe could or would have been easy
But would it
Is anything worth having ever that clean cut
The obstacles are the trial
Do you remember?
She’s walking away with eyes like razor sharp flint
But they don’t cut through anymore and you can’t get why
She’s tired it’s too hurtful now
She’s warned you till the words ran dry
All the times you could have…. Fill in the blanks
Do you remember?

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Treasure trove

Like an old wooden treasure chest she sits there
Filled when the lid is opened with precious gems
Information cascades like a spilled pot of golden nuggets
The rubies,  diamonds, pearls glint to catch the sun
Holding it’s warmth she reels it inside
Intent on filling it with warmth and beauty, fire and love
She pushes down the darkness determined
If she ignores it it will disappear surely
Through the slats the darkness slowly pushes out
Forms foggy shrouds around her
She needs to open the chest more often know her own worth
If the treasure trove were stolen tomorrow
She would sparkle and gleam without it
For the stars live in her eyes
No shooting stars these
But perfect everlasting energy to glint forever
They are her soul her beautiful soul

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Two selves

She is watching but cannot be observed in return
Hovering at the woman’s left shoulder
Like a sentinel trying to warn through soundproof glass
Walk away from this
The woman sometimes catches your scream on the wind
When the frustration of her futile situation angers enough
But she is mostly deaf through choice
Because she heard a question
How much longer will you accept this offer of nothing
Before walking to find something?
Again and again she denies the left hand road
The different ways to turn for fear of…..
What?
You?
Herself?
Him?
Maybe none of these but they mask it all quite nicely
Eventually her head will quiet enough and she will hear
It will be as though she sees the other woman
Her old self,  or maybe the new
And the one to bring her peace from her fears and storms
Was within all along and by her side
Her voice of reason will guide her through

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Our position

You stand there telling the world our position
Maybe it’s what you believe
Though I see you desperate for your day in the sun
With a chance to write your own history books
You in the heroes robes
Do you star in your own little daydreams?
Wearing ermine,  furs and the like
While your hand is itching to slam on the button
Do you see the sorrow you’ll cause in a far off land
Or is it merely a button to strike
I am saddened,  hurt, angry and more
That you have chosen this in my name
There are real lives at risk not tin soldiers who can live again
So awake from the dream you’re no conquering hero
And did they ever exist at all
Wake up become wise and use sense and compassion
Instead of leading the world into war

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015