Try pushing, cajoling
Screaming and wails
Hurl insults like boulders
To get through the day.
Try threats coated in treacle
Not subtle or sweet
You’ll wait till I’m ready
I bow at nobody’s feet.
Watch through cracks in the story
Make your own fairytale end
I can see through your mask
Don’t break and don’t bend.
I may say little to you but read
You so well
I’m wary not scared
You are but a shell.
Ailsa
©️AilsaCawleyPoetry 2018
That’s all it ever was that place
Never referred to as home
A place holding some part
Of me or a future
But a temporary stop, a stable box
A place built only for ghosts.
Forced the words past my lips
To find they stumbled like a foreign tongue
And I knew it would hold nothing
I’d hoped and said that was enough
But the life in it couldn’t light it
With enough warmth, energy
To make something for a future
Build a world I felt happy in.
Tried to make something come true
In the empty souled place
Where nobody could find peace
And I was asked one day what it’d take
To bring light into that space
First thoughts were to burn it down
Erase everything that happened there
Leave the twisted past behind.
Not there now thank my lucky stars
But I wonder as I look in the mirror
Who was I ? Who was she?
So different that she was never me
And she lived in my house
The one that never called me to it
Couldn’t get me to believe I was home.
Ailsa
AilsaCawleyPoetry2018
ailsacawley 