On Resiliance….

Just some thoughts from Kat on Zany Mountain

View from Zany Mountain

It’s become a bit of joke, me messing around about fancying army guys-caveat- I’m one for joking and messing. It’s hardly going to change now at this hour of my life, is it.

Actually if you do one thing-check out the army guys-Jason Fox and Ollie Ollerton-because amazingly-they are tough but have worked the line and describe a process that is both honest and healing.

Yet, here on Zany Moutanin the sunshine, laughs and craic-prevails. Until the shadow darkens on the side of  the mountain and it  doesn’t prevail any more. I’m struck by the images of people working on the frontline and I can’t bear to look. An ER doctor in New York commits suicide as does a paramedic. My heart stops for them.

I can’t bear to look at them twice- or even think of them. I worked the frontline for several years in a totally different capacity-homeless…

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Old wounds healed

Old wounds healed

His words were in the air knives

With blunted blades

You need to leave then go but I’m going to say

To all who’ll hear it was down to you

And a man who I’d rather blame

I went back to get the bare essentials

Two bin bags filled with things

He’d done to plants and flowers

What he tried to do to me and failed

Cut them off and killed connections

Dead things lay on the floor that day

Almost the end of summer and it felt

Like the first of Spring

I was terrified as my heart skipped and jumped

Knowing I no longer needed to sing a song

To make me escape from his clutches

He warned me in direst terms

Of what he’d do, they’d do

And finally I’d done what the song said

I’d broken free

I walked down the lane on butterfly wings

Heart dancing and the sun came out

Gave me her blessing

As she warmed my heart and gave hope

Telling me to keep walking towards tomorrow

Ailsa

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020

Rising

She is rising from the earth to sing

Her age old story on drums

That beat in heart rhythm

And carry on the wind crying

For help and guidance

So she can gather strength

As she walks through fire

Her clay body molding to new shape

Life pieced apart and rebuilt stronger.

He is behind her watchful as she dances

And sings incantations to evoke elders

The forgotten ones, remembering how

To bring them forward he is waiting

For her to signal the way ahead

The time to move on

She whirls lights from the fire catching

Skirts that dance as though alight

Her trance from now to wherever

Is watched with bated breath

She will dance faster, slower, faster

Not stopping until the answer is there

Only then will exhaustion take her

Her words before sleep to be passed

Among the gathering folk

Whispers from person to person

Man to woman, child to adult

She said the goddess spoke to her

Our mission is to carry on before the fire

Listening to the earth and saving her

The message has never changed

We carry on dancing and drumming

The earth is passing the message herself

We must listen for her roar could deafen

Even those who want to silence her.

Ailsa

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020