Climbing

I see the hill to a hard road ahead

Slippery climb through earth

Wet, sliding and falling

Hit the ground, teeth grinding

Against pain as I force myself on

Enduring to win and take back

My power , my path.

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry 2020

Apparition

Apparition

I see you standing on the stair

Feel the chill that takes the air

Cold fingers run down my spine

Like the nail trails a line

I see you standing at the door

Watch you standing evermore

The touch familiar on my back

My mind is beginning to crack

I’ve seen you daily for so long

I no longer think that something’s wrong

Accepted that you are dwelling there

The space is large enough to share

Do I see the features,? you have enquired

Is it something all in your mind

I have accepted that this apparition

Has passed the life and death transition

I wander out to see the sun

To tell myself that you are gone

I turn to see you behind the pane

Window steams from your breath again

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020

Ekphrastic challenge November with Paul Brookes @PaulDragonWolf1 thewombwellrainbow

Do you see me?

Do you see me, really?

Not who you want me to be

Or think I should be

Would be if I shaved my edges off

So you could see what you want

And I would be what you’ve desired

All these years your vision skewed

Have you ever once seen me?

Looked at me closely without distaste

Because I’m not who you envisioned I’d be

When you first started pushing, pulling at me

Trying to remove my awkwardness

Angry that what was there wasn’t desirable

I’ve noticed you still trying to cut

Little bits off when you think nobody sees

But here’s the thing

Even those who don’t know you have it

The vision to go beneath your veneer

They see you too and you’re blind to it.

Ailsa

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020

Lightgiver

Teaching not preaching or leading

Words that said this was me

I can tell you how light is in everyday

Sun shining through a crack in curtains

The lightgiver taught me that

You don’t need baking sun

To warm a scared heart

You don’t need much of anything

To make a new or brighter start

Only one thing is necessary

A willingness for light to flood

As it washes away the dark

Ailsa

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020

Rising

She is rising from the earth to sing

Her age old story on drums

That beat in heart rhythm

And carry on the wind crying

For help and guidance

So she can gather strength

As she walks through fire

Her clay body molding to new shape

Life pieced apart and rebuilt stronger.

He is behind her watchful as she dances

And sings incantations to evoke elders

The forgotten ones, remembering how

To bring them forward he is waiting

For her to signal the way ahead

The time to move on

She whirls lights from the fire catching

Skirts that dance as though alight

Her trance from now to wherever

Is watched with bated breath

She will dance faster, slower, faster

Not stopping until the answer is there

Only then will exhaustion take her

Her words before sleep to be passed

Among the gathering folk

Whispers from person to person

Man to woman, child to adult

She said the goddess spoke to her

Our mission is to carry on before the fire

Listening to the earth and saving her

The message has never changed

We carry on dancing and drumming

The earth is passing the message herself

We must listen for her roar could deafen

Even those who want to silence her.

Ailsa

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020

Plated

Stepping forth in her armour she felt invincible

Her resolve not to be broken

The looks on their faces were shocked

Astonished at her audacity

That she’d not done what was expected

Her face cleared of the usual paint

Sleek hair left to be wild and exuberant

Suddenly in her nakedness she felt it

Powerful, in control

Their shock at her being as she wanted

Scared them

No heels, paint, sleek dress just her

Armour plated by being naked

She stared them down when they demanded

Smile pretty lady it’s not the end of the world

Yeah? She replied it is.

Ailsa

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020

High

The persona that you projected

I am up here on high and bear your presence

I will grit my teeth to see gratitude

Spewing out of you and I remain high

Lofty, above you, and someone to aspire to

Accepting all adulation with a wave

Expect you to fall at my feet and you will.

Your world depends upon who sees you as special

Who will do anything to please you

Fawn over you and into line

Like little tin soldiers you watch from on high.

Apparently I dissented in the ranks

Fell out before I was told to go

Oh I can see all the cracks, chinks in armour

I’d rather be here on the outside

Than there on your fake high

Wondering how far it’s going to be

On the way down to the bottom.

Ailsa

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020

The world he’s locked in

His stories are those of a person persuaded

That life has passed him by

People crushing his spirit and grinding

Their heels into his head

Because he isn’t what was expected.

So he chooses the path of least resistance

Pressing a button that destroys his world

Because he’s afraid of losing happiness

Fighting it from happening is easier

Than the disappointment as it walks away.

He’s tired of hiding behind the shell of pretence

That he’s so carefully constructed

To show the world the clown who loses

But it’s there flickering , the light

That’s now refusing to be extinguished

Now he knows some people believe in him.

Ailsa

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020

The stuff inside

Inside I know so much about things

But people see a person wasted

I’m in turmoil as I try to get through

Knowing what I know about myself

Knowing what people think of me.

Some look and turn away

From the person they’re sure they know

Judge me on my exterior facade

It’s tough and harder by the day

Keeping a mask in place for you all.

Some people just see the man underneath

But most see someone they’re scared of being

Like my life, hurt is contagious

Cross the road he’s coming

Dodge him or you catch his plague

I’m still battling my demons and I might lose

If I don’t have the people who will pass

The time of day and let me know

They see me really see me

Not the damn bogeyman out to get them.

I don’t expect your help I’m a man in turmoil

And we’re supposed to just deal with it.

I can’t. I can’t.

Ailsa

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry2020

Bright one

Blessings to you from the earth

This Brigids day morning

Dawn of the new day

And new season has sprung.

Blessings to you from the wind

On which your poetry carries

Far and wide, land to land.

Watching over the people who see

That the maiden breathes warm air

Over flowers for land

Be they edible or medicine

Blessings from the bright one

Brigid sends blessings among you

As water runs clear and cool

The babies will come now winter ends

All hail Brigid bringing her blessings

To you bright one.

©️AilsaCawleyPoetry 2020