Month: June 2016

Shuffle closer 

Shuffle closer little one I have a tale to tell 

Of golden hordes and dragons offers to save the lives of men 

But just as surely will you hear the souls that they do sell 

Laugh as you wish at monsters lurking in a den 

Be not too certain that I jest so heed me very well
Shuffle closer little one this is a fairy tale 

But have you heard the fae folk passed on as pretty stories? 

Or can you hear warning bells as their ships set a sail 

Feel they’ll conquer all return puffed up and glorious 

Be not so certain that I lie or serve the people best 
Shuffle closer little one your eyes are e’er so wide 

You look at me with painful wounded eyes 

Sure the dragon was evilly wicked inside 

The folks you thought wee faeries gleeful as the great beast dies 

Be careful what you see my child is always to be believed 
The dragon fought for common good 

These fae folk their own goals 

Neither wrong in their own minds eye 

Look closely at the glistening coals 

As their union it now dies 
Shuffle closer little one and learn before the night is through 

That what you see in front of you is exactly as it seems 

Look once, twice maybe thrice 

Until you’re sure as you can be 

Don’t be willing to make that blind jump 

For something you can’t feel 
Shuffle closer little one learn the lesson well 

I know you do trust me now 

But I can hear it clanging madly that life ending bell 

You must see this is your end my child take a bow 
Ailsa 

© AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

 

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Disappearing from view

I may be disappearing from view for a while I wanted you to know 

But pause now and then on the path you take 

You’ll find me there at your side a chance to help you grow 

No reason to falter, quiver or quake 

Imagine the veil drawn over the bride 

Concern yourself only the words I’ve said 

It’s like I have chosen only to hide 

Not forever but so your heart and head 

Can get into rhythm then the pain will slow 

There are days you will ache just for one sighting 

Mostly you’ll think of me smiling and know 

The veil has been lifted just a trick of the lighting ? 

Feel me close, speak as you would 

Not with ears but listen so closely 

You will know I am there just as I said I would 

Only sometimes to fade like my best summer rose 
Ailsa 

©AilsaCawley2016 

Patterns of life 

You couldn’t help but hear as the excitement charged his voice 

It’s not done that ever before 

Other voices still talking slowly quieten 

As he yelled 

The blood it flies everywhere, if you do it right 

I mean of all the times I did it and……

What hasn’t happened ?he’s asked urgently 

It makes patterns there’s nothing and then this amazing pattern 

All the times I hit her before well slap cuz I’m not violent right? 

Daring them to disagree 

And it looks the best game I’ve never seen it in life 

Blood lust dripping from his voice 

Like sap from a tree 

Telling himself it’s ok to do it and no one is shocked 

Except for the listener, me at the window 

Sickened and fearful 

For the things that pass for normal  

I will her, whoever she is to run and not return 

Listen to no promises of never again 

Because for some this becomes a pattern of life.
Ailsa 

©AilsaCawleyPoetry 2016

In judgement fall

You stand in judgement without knowledge of her 

Giving stern looks and harsh words 

Seeing only that which you want to see no matter 

Whether it contains truth or reason 

You think you have her pegged stripped and bare 

Laid before your leering eyes 

To scrutinise and take just a little more of her soul 

But now the protection you cannot see is spinning forth 

She isn’t helpless and defeated 

Building herself back up and soothing from within 

Her defences may look down 

You may think like a fallen fighter she can be counted out 

But like the whirling swirling mist she will devour 

The world you think you have torn away 

Was only a facade underneath her being thrums with need 

Her walls built of stone eyes of slate watch 

You see nothing nothing at all 

The warrior she is fighting back to the surface 

Do not underestimate her capacity to rebuild and conquer 
Ailsa 

©AilsaCawleyPoetry 2016

Actors dilemma 

The actor shifts a little to the left off stage an audience 
No longer a player 

Her part dictates participation in this farcical charade 

Which is more tragedy than drama 

Leaving her feeling a drained shell of a being a duality 

Now so wearying that in hiding all she exposes more than ever she would have 

So many buried things writhe to the top 

Her body never rests with the twitching of the otherlings she feels 

As they shift to the surface and faces with razor mouths bite 

Pulling from her core the hidden things 

Feelings unfelt, words unsaid, tears unshed pushed deep 

She almost hates herself for allowing and denying the words that spill 

But they purge as they make her feel vile and vicious 

For voicing truths hidden in boxes 

The stories hidden in filthy boxes at the back of the mind attic 

Locked and chained until now 

A time she knew would come but could not ready herself for 

The words float on the wind

Musical notes alive with deep meaning and pockets of dirty air 

The creatures wriggle giggling with joy at what they want to release 

She fights them clamping some things inside 

Determined they will waste away in their boxes and harm no more 

Wanting to strike out at the silent aggressor on the stage 

She knows given time she can be victorious 

If these things would stop biting to the surface demanding 

To be told now 

Heaving them aside she moves on to do mindless things 

Knowing one day these demons will out.
Ailsa 

©AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

There

I am there and feel such peace my body cannot stay rigid 

Like bones removed I flop around as mind floats wild 

Time it seems to stop there 

Oh I love such enduring harmony 

As I’m quietly assaulted by every possibility 

Make sense of what has been before 

See that which is to come 

Bring heart , soul, mind and world and call myself back home 
Ailsa 

©AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

The door is always bolted

I allow her to go out sometimes he stated nonchalantly 

Because I’m a magnanimous sort 

They have to be allowed out occasionally to keep them happy 

I let her breathe sometimes 

Though not too often as that’s not good for everyone 

She asks nicely if I mind knows her place 

Me? Well I do as I please like I should isn’t it obvious 

Unless I say the door is always bolted 

You see if the key were in sight she’d only get curious 

As to what else is out there 

Ideas might start occurring to her that aren’t any help to me 

Best to allow a taste of freedom 

She can’t see she’s my prisoner at all my friend 

Tie the rope loosely like you do a dog 

He shrugs, grins, and wags a finger to his listener 

Mark my words you’ll rue the day 

You decided to leave off the bolt, chain and let her be free 

Because I know from experience a locked door 

Is always what has to be slid gradually into place. 

The door keep it bolted friend while keeping your smile on your face. 

Swaggers away so sure he’s so learned, clever, wise 

Confusion on his face when his friend asks what’s the fear in your eyes ?

You mix me up with someone else he retorts 

She knows her place dammit!! 

Unknown to him I saw him in the street 

No ogre of massive proportions he 

And I wondered who really let who out after all 

You almost wavered in a stiff breeze 

Couldn’t catch an eye and fear on a person speaking 

Maybe my disgust and anger were directed at 

A bit part player and echoed too closely for me 

Stopped by shadows of then imposing on the world of now.
Ailsa 

©AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

Your face of desire 

Watching me closely a monitor of the hatred 

You imagine I must hold 

That’s your driving emotion deep in the dark part of you 

Once I held pity like a prisoner 

Understanding as a lamp or beacon 

Now, now I have 

Nothing 

Just a space where once I dragged excuses from 

To say why you did or didn’t and gave silent approval 

For your lack of care to carry on 

Unreasonable unchecked 

Never did you fear a rebuke or worse 

Like a child seeking attention by default 

You try to goad an angry reaction from empty canals 

Nothing flows any more in the land of yesterday 

The fear you instilled to pick at her confidence is gone 

Melted as ice in the sun 

She has no energy to give you and now as the child you remain 

Your ploys for something to feed your self esteem 

Are ignored by her ears 

Forever deaf to the need to be first, last, centre 

As flotsam you float away 

Ignored 
Ailsa 

©AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

Your face of desire 

Watching me closely a monitor of the hatred 

You imagine I must hold 

That’s your driving emotion deep in the dark part of you 

Once I held pity like a prisoner 

Understanding as a lamp or beacon 

Now, now I have 

Nothing 

Just a space where once I dragged excuses from 

To say why you did or didn’t and gave silent approval 

For your lack of care to carry on 

Unreasonable unchecked 

Never did you fear a rebuke or worse 

Like a child seeking attention by default 

You try to goad an angry reaction from empty canals 

Nothing flows any more in the land of yesterday 

The fear you instilled to pick at her confidence is gone 

Melted as ice in the sun 

She has no energy to give you and now as the child you remain 

Your ploys for something to feed your self esteem 

Are ignored by her ears 

Forever deaf to the need to be first, last, centre 

As flotsam you float away 

Ignored 
Ailsa 

©AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

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