Category: life

Sky dance

The whoops and wails, Catherine wheel trails
Descending to land in a dance
And she watches afraid but can’t tear away
As beauty with horror unfolds
What is it exploding in marvellous dance above?
Has it come but to kill or cure
It’s broken the darkness of the skies with magnificent colour
But her eyes make her stay
Such a spectacle in mystical greens holding spectres
Purple gifts of hope entertwine
She knows she should run and hide
For it’s always been this way or you’ll bring on (she shivers)
The end of the world
These are the curses of woman they say
A dawning mind tells her who would know it was her
If it were true….
So she stands tall, taller still braving the storm expected
To find that after effects are simply this
The skies darken to only stars knowing
That she didn’t hide or flee
The most beauteous sight seeing but for now…
Can’t repeat.

Ailsa

©AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

Unmasking the gift

Quietly calm and willing to give of herself
There is no limit to the support offered
Never been told the credit limit is reached
A top up required
A repayment due
To those who are within her circle of trust
Holding up the walls around her hear the selected moments
The times she shares her side
Not just soaking up their troubles like an oily rag
Now? 
She is allowing herself to think and be free
Giving still many a gift
But today she acquiesced that it’s really alright
To need rest
Ask for a hand to hold
In the twilight,  midnight,  darkness
Hell she is deserving and so worth it all
Filled to the brim now her knowing expands
Her learning or her staying will show things
In a wondrous three dimensional way
And she will be thankful for it all now
Her beauty
The type she sees as normal
Has just grown wings to make her fly high
Do I know her?……

Ailsa
© AilsaCawleyPoetry 2015

Would you walk?

Would you walk by my side with a guiding hand?
Hold fast as the darkness pulls my coat tails taking me down
Would you shine a light just enough to show the path
But not enough to force me to abandon my heart
Which is slowly getting used to a different tomorrow
A one where I live in a land I don’t want to understand
I will because it’s inevitable
But now,  well now my friend you are by my side
I can look forward,  with the help of my guide
You stay asking nothing in return for your care
And it’s this that comforts me as I travel on the way
It’s with your strength I have gone from darkened rooms
I can now glimpse a clearer brighter day
The world as I knew it has changed evermore
But your hand upon my shoulder
With barely a word spoken
Your strength more apparent than even you can know
My way ahead now showing some sign of things to come
Not once did I have to ask the question or wonder where to go
Because my unnecessary question of you was answered
Before I asked
My friend I know that whatever problems arise
You beside me walk

Ailsa
© AilsaCawleyPoetry 2015

Faithless 

The words you speak tell me I am faithless 

That I hold my head aloft to the skies in fabulous pretence 

And I look to piles of rust, not shining icons ahead 

But I have looked through and past your little ruse now 

I look above, beyond so I don’t feel compelled to look at your twisted countenance 

Which sees someone they know nothing of except a wishful longing 

Of who they’d be if……. 

And remains perplexed that my mettle can bend but not break 

So yes I am as you say faithless utterly faithless 

Gasp as you wish

The reason I am as I am is you 

You tried to keep my faith by breaking me apart 

And succeeded only in creating something stronger in its place 

Faithless I am, peaceful I shall stay
Ailsa

©AilsaCawleyPoetry 2015

What is it they see?

As she glances away from the looking glass to be

Anyone else than whom they imagine they see

Her mind it plays all these things in her head

What if,  for instance,  this is all let’s pretend?

The smiles were fake but the laughter was real

They don’t even like me and I know it’s true what I feel

And other people have friends but I missed out on this page

Should I have been someone who changed to suit the age

I can’t register all the same things that they do

My thoughts on things stay more constant and true

Must I keep up with fashion and trends

If all I want is a few trusted friends?  

Turning again and looking into the glass

Her eyes like grey flint harden at last

Who else can I be she’s resolved to herself

Than the original intended even if it’s only myself.  

How long did it take to come to this decision?

Many long years and so much derision

Now standing proud and holding herself up straighter

To herself she’s now true and no longer the traitor.

 

Ailsa

© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Wonder of the dance

Hardly a breath taken as she leans closer, closer still 
Getting drawn in to her own astonishment as the tale dances in her veins 
It takes her over and she is not an observer she is there 
Audible intake of breath as the snow begins to fall inside the room fluttering down 
Her hand clapped to her mouth 
Head shaking in disbelief as the girl in the feathered tutu seems to fly across the boards 
And she is so overcome the tears sting her eyelids but don’t break free
Incase they hamper her view of the wonders ahead 
She is part of their world if even for a short time it’s a glimpse into myth and magic 
But it’s true because she’s here and a witness to every move they make
She can believe in magic in its sparkly , twinkly beauty 
Because magic shows its ugliness and glamour in equal measure and there’s always a way
A way through the dark, the fear 
She leaves after the encore filled with a knowing otherness 
She will make her own future and she is beautiful 
She can be , she is magic.

Ailsa
©AilsaCawleyPoetry2015

Blinded by glitter

You tell yourself it’ll be fine and you’ll get to it later
Because it’s never went wrong on you before has it?
Has it?
Oh right, I forgot again, nothing is ever your fault
And while you scurry off muttering white rabbits and chasing
The latest piece of blinding glitter down a hole,
To find out of this is the piece of glitter to make yoy whole
Complete the collection
You missed the one who shines with effervescent light beside you,
Or pushed behind you because you saw glitter
And had to chase your precious
Whilst leaving a diamond surrounded by rubies in the dust
Because it hadn’t enough glamour and wonder the shine worn off
Chase your next dream
Go on be my guest there will be nothing left next time you turn
To the jewel of them all
So many warnings and portents of your ruination have you had
Yet you ignored them all as fools knowing nothing
Carry on taking till there’s nothing left but ask yourself
What happens then?
Too blinded by glitter to see the real shine of truth
And now you’re left no sparkle, no sunshine warmth
In a yellowing sepia picture left out in the desert too long
Dry ,crackling and bare
You remember behind you, turn but nobody is there.

Ailsa
©AilsaCawleyPoetry2015

Understanding

It’s dawning on her slowly as she seeks to not believe
That again the door is closed on her
A step forward with a smile she nods and offers a yes
To the question of whether she understands
Of course she doesn’t but what can be said
It makes no difference to say otherwise and appear foolish
When the door to discussion is locked and barred
Where do you go
You can have no understanding or clarity
And it changes nothing
Just adds one more tick to the chart of letdowns
Going towards the land of doesn’t matter any more
He has won a small victory with no arguments he thinks
Puffed up with ego like a balloon floating on his win
Till the day he is left shocked as he watches her
Cut the cord
In full and clear understanding.

Ailsa
© AilsaCawleyPoetry2015

Do you remember?

What was it that first drew your eyes to her
And held them there
Who you thought it was you wanted to be a part of
And be the reason for her smile
Do you remember?
Were you trying to make her so that she pushed
It wasn’t your fault
You’ll say she jumped ship not your fault you shrug
Always going to happen
Did your mind engineer it to be this way in the plan
Too good to believe it would last
And now you’re proved right
Do you remember?
Counter argue that one day it maybe could or would have been easy
But would it
Is anything worth having ever that clean cut
The obstacles are the trial
Do you remember?
She’s walking away with eyes like razor sharp flint
But they don’t cut through anymore and you can’t get why
She’s tired it’s too hurtful now
She’s warned you till the words ran dry
All the times you could have…. Fill in the blanks
Do you remember?

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Treasure trove

Like an old wooden treasure chest she sits there
Filled when the lid is opened with precious gems
Information cascades like a spilled pot of golden nuggets
The rubies,  diamonds, pearls glint to catch the sun
Holding it’s warmth she reels it inside
Intent on filling it with warmth and beauty, fire and love
She pushes down the darkness determined
If she ignores it it will disappear surely
Through the slats the darkness slowly pushes out
Forms foggy shrouds around her
She needs to open the chest more often know her own worth
If the treasure trove were stolen tomorrow
She would sparkle and gleam without it
For the stars live in her eyes
No shooting stars these
But perfect everlasting energy to glint forever
They are her soul her beautiful soul

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015