Mercurial Mairi

She arrived slipping out from the wall it seems
A liquid flowing form so mercurial
Yet I’m drawn to speak with her as if an urgent need has arisen
What exactly troubles you child, she asks soothing,
This place
Exactly what she emphasises with a smile
Encouragement or amused by me I cannot tell
It’s stealing me
How can it get into the very depths winding
Like Ivy it is surrounding me from all angles
Ahhh is her reply
Her grasp cool on my arm
Be still child,  it is not predator and prey we discuss
Don’t you feel it,  the difference here?
Nodding without a word
It’s the gods,  yours,  mine,  any, none
They have answered your call do you see?
They take something first to be sure you don’t feeeel it, hmmm
It’s a sense of something shifting,  slipping
When they’re sure they take other parts if they need to
What do they take (eyeing the room like it’s at fault!)??
You feel your heart shift first
Your mind following after if it needs to imagine
Some hearts are more logical resistant to impulse
Tell me child,  where does your heart bide?
Where can you find wildness,  desolation,  beauty and more
Do you feel peace and tranquillity and everything more
Do you see storms and run away or need to stay
See light play in morning and evening and magic dance in the air
Tell me child,  where else can you fare?
I nod you’re right is it really that simple
As a tap on my shoulder
Whose voice tells me we’re going are you ready?
I’m just….
Talking to that wall I know,  first sign of madness he laughs
Looking back she is gone mercurial mairi
Like she never was there…..

Ailsa

©AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

Skye skies

The bluish light pulls itself over the horizon
Bleeding slowly and creeping towards me silent, brooding
I see around those who feel only menace
Calming to watch the hues play out
Their tones change with the moments deepening
Reaching like the arms of a giant
But I know not whether you will hold or smother
From safety to menace
The breath catches in my throat as blue,  green,  purple mingle
Swirling like the currents in a brook eddy
Overtaken in a sudden blanket of black
The light of day has gone now
To leave the chill night?
Yes
Looking up I am heartened by the trail above me
The magical starscape map
That can lead me anywhere but will hold me
As it’s willing prisoner

Ailsa

©AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

Sky dance

The whoops and wails, Catherine wheel trails
Descending to land in a dance
And she watches afraid but can’t tear away
As beauty with horror unfolds
What is it exploding in marvellous dance above?
Has it come but to kill or cure
It’s broken the darkness of the skies with magnificent colour
But her eyes make her stay
Such a spectacle in mystical greens holding spectres
Purple gifts of hope entertwine
She knows she should run and hide
For it’s always been this way or you’ll bring on (she shivers)
The end of the world
These are the curses of woman they say
A dawning mind tells her who would know it was her
If it were true….
So she stands tall, taller still braving the storm expected
To find that after effects are simply this
The skies darken to only stars knowing
That she didn’t hide or flee
The most beauteous sight seeing but for now…
Can’t repeat.

Ailsa

©AilsaCawleyPoetry2016

Unmasking the gift

Quietly calm and willing to give of herself
There is no limit to the support offered
Never been told the credit limit is reached
A top up required
A repayment due
To those who are within her circle of trust
Holding up the walls around her hear the selected moments
The times she shares her side
Not just soaking up their troubles like an oily rag
Now? 
She is allowing herself to think and be free
Giving still many a gift
But today she acquiesced that it’s really alright
To need rest
Ask for a hand to hold
In the twilight,  midnight,  darkness
Hell she is deserving and so worth it all
Filled to the brim now her knowing expands
Her learning or her staying will show things
In a wondrous three dimensional way
And she will be thankful for it all now
Her beauty
The type she sees as normal
Has just grown wings to make her fly high
Do I know her?……

Ailsa
© AilsaCawleyPoetry 2015

Would you walk?

Would you walk by my side with a guiding hand?
Hold fast as the darkness pulls my coat tails taking me down
Would you shine a light just enough to show the path
But not enough to force me to abandon my heart
Which is slowly getting used to a different tomorrow
A one where I live in a land I don’t want to understand
I will because it’s inevitable
But now,  well now my friend you are by my side
I can look forward,  with the help of my guide
You stay asking nothing in return for your care
And it’s this that comforts me as I travel on the way
It’s with your strength I have gone from darkened rooms
I can now glimpse a clearer brighter day
The world as I knew it has changed evermore
But your hand upon my shoulder
With barely a word spoken
Your strength more apparent than even you can know
My way ahead now showing some sign of things to come
Not once did I have to ask the question or wonder where to go
Because my unnecessary question of you was answered
Before I asked
My friend I know that whatever problems arise
You beside me walk

Ailsa
© AilsaCawleyPoetry 2015

Faithless 

The words you speak tell me I am faithless 

That I hold my head aloft to the skies in fabulous pretence 

And I look to piles of rust, not shining icons ahead 

But I have looked through and past your little ruse now 

I look above, beyond so I don’t feel compelled to look at your twisted countenance 

Which sees someone they know nothing of except a wishful longing 

Of who they’d be if……. 

And remains perplexed that my mettle can bend but not break 

So yes I am as you say faithless utterly faithless 

Gasp as you wish

The reason I am as I am is you 

You tried to keep my faith by breaking me apart 

And succeeded only in creating something stronger in its place 

Faithless I am, peaceful I shall stay
Ailsa

©AilsaCawleyPoetry 2015

What is it they see?

As she glances away from the looking glass to be

Anyone else than whom they imagine they see

Her mind it plays all these things in her head

What if,  for instance,  this is all let’s pretend?

The smiles were fake but the laughter was real

They don’t even like me and I know it’s true what I feel

And other people have friends but I missed out on this page

Should I have been someone who changed to suit the age

I can’t register all the same things that they do

My thoughts on things stay more constant and true

Must I keep up with fashion and trends

If all I want is a few trusted friends?  

Turning again and looking into the glass

Her eyes like grey flint harden at last

Who else can I be she’s resolved to herself

Than the original intended even if it’s only myself.  

How long did it take to come to this decision?

Many long years and so much derision

Now standing proud and holding herself up straighter

To herself she’s now true and no longer the traitor.

 

Ailsa

© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Waiting

You wait for me to comment on your created world
But this time it won’t happen
I watch quietly for you may disturb the resting
Phantoms
Should you do so fearing my angry roar will be the least
Of your worries
For I have warned you to beware the trees
They remember all your past doings and they wait
For you to become dust
And to strengthen their majestic dynasty
Yes I remember you have no fear of anything
No man, beast so you say
But you have your age old fear of the dark places
You know in the locked place
The one you call your heart
And I name an empty chamber of ghouls
That the darkness calls to you cosseting your ears
With a lovers smooth words
One day you will walk into your own forest
Full of ogres, spectres,  ghouls of days gone
You thought
And find yourself unable to escape from your own creation

Ailsa
© AilsaCawley Poetry 2015

Wonder of the dance

Hardly a breath taken as she leans closer, closer still 
Getting drawn in to her own astonishment as the tale dances in her veins 
It takes her over and she is not an observer she is there 
Audible intake of breath as the snow begins to fall inside the room fluttering down 
Her hand clapped to her mouth 
Head shaking in disbelief as the girl in the feathered tutu seems to fly across the boards 
And she is so overcome the tears sting her eyelids but don’t break free
Incase they hamper her view of the wonders ahead 
She is part of their world if even for a short time it’s a glimpse into myth and magic 
But it’s true because she’s here and a witness to every move they make
She can believe in magic in its sparkly , twinkly beauty 
Because magic shows its ugliness and glamour in equal measure and there’s always a way
A way through the dark, the fear 
She leaves after the encore filled with a knowing otherness 
She will make her own future and she is beautiful 
She can be , she is magic.

Ailsa
©AilsaCawleyPoetry2015

Blinded by glitter

You tell yourself it’ll be fine and you’ll get to it later
Because it’s never went wrong on you before has it?
Has it?
Oh right, I forgot again, nothing is ever your fault
And while you scurry off muttering white rabbits and chasing
The latest piece of blinding glitter down a hole,
To find out of this is the piece of glitter to make yoy whole
Complete the collection
You missed the one who shines with effervescent light beside you,
Or pushed behind you because you saw glitter
And had to chase your precious
Whilst leaving a diamond surrounded by rubies in the dust
Because it hadn’t enough glamour and wonder the shine worn off
Chase your next dream
Go on be my guest there will be nothing left next time you turn
To the jewel of them all
So many warnings and portents of your ruination have you had
Yet you ignored them all as fools knowing nothing
Carry on taking till there’s nothing left but ask yourself
What happens then?
Too blinded by glitter to see the real shine of truth
And now you’re left no sparkle, no sunshine warmth
In a yellowing sepia picture left out in the desert too long
Dry ,crackling and bare
You remember behind you, turn but nobody is there.

Ailsa
©AilsaCawleyPoetry2015