Awakening

Nudging me all night with questions
If this is sorted, 
Will it pass muster (do)
If I don’t walk in telling you I love someone else
But I say that it’s you I settled for
And my words are coated in honey wine
Will you notice as I dig in the blade?
And watch as you shrink and shrivel
Like a dried out prune, a burst balloon
All your confidence and respect gone once again
I will only play a game I want to play
Say I love you for now
It looks like the dice are loaded in my favour
But really they aren’t
It’s hard being me you know!!
So as your questions and queries thicken
And it’s like being in a dark forest with trees that are moving,
Twisting and turning up round my throat
Your final question
Designed to wound
Backfires as you never thought it would
Will we get through this and stay together?
No, and I think we never should!
Leave tomorrow I can take no more
I’ve been here before
And I tell you freely
I got through then battered and bleeding
But I haven’t yet died
May be torn, twisted and bruised
But it taught me I don’t need to be used

Ailsa

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